Round 2: “I’ve been dating someone for a little over 3 months now and it’s getting serious but he is involved with someone else. I’ve fallen hard for this person and I don’t know what to do. Help!”
-Submited by Dazed and Confused
“Mr. Always Right”
Fall the FUCK back. Who is it getting serious for, both of ya’ll or just you? Cause if it was serious for him, he would have left his girlfriend and just been single and dating you. Listen, if ya’ll just gon have fun, or fuck or whatever then it is what it is, but if you want more you need to make some space and see what happens. If a guy wants you, he’s gonna do what it takes. Honestly, you dont really wanna get him by takin him from his girl anyway, cause if you DO get him what’s gonna stop him from talking to another chick once ya’ll are together..Same way you get a nigga you’ll lose him. So make some space and see what happens.
“The Georgia Peach”
“Move on! Easier said then done but your feelings count too. 3 months is not a long time at all . Someone else is bound to come along. In the meantime, get to know your wants and needs , so you can be better prepared.”
“The Free Spirit”
Ohhhhh boy! Been there, done that and there’s a 98% chance that things won’t end well….for you! First things first, what indication has he given you that things are “pretty serious?” Has he introduced you to family? friends? Have you two discussed a future? More than likely, it’s a hard no. You’re giving him everything that he wants, without having to commit, so he’s not going to. My advice? If it’s been over 3 months and he’s still with her, he’s NOT leaving and in the 2% chance that he does, it won’t be worth the constant worry that he’s going to do the same thing he did to her, to you. You deserve better.
Warning!!!! Before you fall for someone make sure it’s mutual. If you know the person you’re dating is also involved with someone else then keep in mind you don’t have that person’s 100% full attention which means you may be the “side piece”. Always do your homework before getting too deeply involved or you will get burned!!!!!!!
“Unbothered and Unfiltered”
Umm y’all are not dating. It sounds like you’re a backup. First off I don’t know what your definition of dating is. Yes you can be dating multiple people but if you’re saying it’s gotten serious there shouldn’t be anybody else. Your best bet is to talk to him and tell him how you feel and see what he says. I feel like there’s more to this story then was given.
“The Flower Child”
you should feel comfortable to ask the, “Where is this going?,” question. Clearly, if he’s still involved with someone else, he doesn’t know of your interest in being exclusive to one another. Don’t come in intense asking about short and long term goals for your relationship and no ultimatums! You like this guy, just take it easy. Tell him what you’re thinking and ask him the same. If your stars align, awesome. If not, maybe your focus can sway to another “friend” as well. It doesn’t mean you’ve lost interest in continuing to get to know him, but at least you know to keep things light. When a guy wants you, I mean really wants you, he’ll let you know. The best thing you can do is communicate your interest. Sort of, a ball is in his court kind of thing. If he decides to play, then you’ve beat the competition! If not, then draft yourself a few more players and let him sweat it out on the sidelines!
“The Wild One”
-Took a different approach to the question and gave his perspective for if he was in that situation.
If I really cared about her I would give her an ultimatum. Either it’s me or it’s Him. Being a “side nigga” is cool only if you’re trying to have fun, but when your feelings get involved it’s a whole nother ball game. Triangles occur. Feelings get involved and people get hurt .
“The Sour Patch”
First, you need to talk to that person to see if he/she wants you in their future. Believe me.. you can tell when a person is serious or playing games! If they hesitate or talk in circles… Hmmm, you better leave it alone! If that person takes you serious, make it known that you want a exclusive relationship. So no extras involved. Now,if you continue to date the non-committed person, beware of the title SIDE-CHICK!!! Yea that’s going to be your name! Good luck on your shenanigan endeavors! 🙂
In a nutshell……chances are…..
Submit your question to The Panel: